click here to tweet this post
click here to share with your friends
subscribe to this feed
Top Eleven Reasons Why the Reformed Theologian Did not Cross the Road
by C Michael PattonJuly 22nd, 2010
13 Comments
11. A woman already crossed. We don’t follow women.
10. We don’t believe the road is safe. It wasn’t built between 1500-1700 A.D.
9. We believe that “road crossing” ceased with the death of the last Apostle or the completion of the New Testament.
8. The crossing guard was only helping people cross from one side to the other, so we are suspicious. Is this a denial of double pre-destination?
7. Neither Romans 9 or John 6 say anything about crossing roads. Therefore, it is unbiblical.
6. The “Walk” sign was gender neutral. It made us mad.
5. The road was called Tiber Ave.
4. John Wesley said that God’s prevenient grace would pave the way, but we have to take the steps ourselves. What a load!
3. We were not elected to cross before the foundation of the road.
2. Piper said that God is most glorified when we are most satisfied on our side of the road.
1. The pub is on this side of the road.
Similar Posts:
- Top Ten Reasons the Evangelical Did Not Cross the Road
- Top Ten Reasons the Dispensationalist Did NOT Cross the Road
- Top Eleven Reasons the Arminian Did Not Cross the Road
- Top Ten Reasons Why the Emerger Did Not Cross the Road?
- Top Ten Books (Sam Storms)
Loading ...
13 Comments
Like or Dislike:
0
12. All of my books are on this side of the road.
13. We never cross anywhere, especially roads. It makes me feel too Catholic for my tastes.
14. All true believers persevere to the end of this side of the road.
Like or Dislike:
0
15. Even if crossing the road is biblical, it isn’t part of our systematic theology, so we leave it out.
Like or Dislike:
0
I especially like #’s 4 and 2, Wesley and Piper.
Like or Dislike:
0
Smiled throughout the list, laughed out loud at number one.
Like or Dislike:
0
Haha! 3 was so funny!! 2 was great. I didn’t get 1, 5, or 10.
Cheers!
Like or Dislike:
0
Great list, Michael. Thanks.
Like or Dislike:
0
Having the pub on this side of the road is all it would take for me.
Like or Dislike:
0
As a social-drinking Reformed Christian, I enjoyed laughing at myself with #1.
Like or Dislike:
1
Absolute genius. Yeah, i’m gonna have to go with #1 as my fav. Guilty as charged
Like or Dislike:
0
Now that’s funny. I don’t care who you are.
Like or Dislike:
0
Very clever, all. I can’t pick a favorite. I’m glad a stumbled upon your blog.
Like or Dislike:
0
[...] think that they are picking on dispensationalists (of which I am one), they also have posts on why did the reformed theologian not . . . 11. A woman already crossed. We don’t follow [...]
Like or Dislike:
0
[...] Top Eleven Reasons Why the Reformed Theologian Did not Cross the Road [...]
More Comments: