Also, when the term husband is used in relation to who God is to his people, it is in the context of covenant infractions and also promises (such as the passage you posted). He never identifies with being a surrogate spouse to individuals but promises to be a protector and provider to Israel, as a covenant people.

Yes, dependency on God is crucial and we do need to be content in whatever state we find ourselves. If you read carefully what I’ve written in paragraphs 4 and 5, you’ll see that fulfillment in our heavenly relationship cannot be replaced by an earthly relationship and God ultimately fulfills where others can’t. We must look to him to do so. But that does not make him a substitute for a spouse.

I came across the following when I was in the throws of a really bad relationship coming to an end w/my earthly “husband”:

“Isaiah 54:5-7 (King James Version)

5For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.

6For the LORD hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith thy God.

7For a small moment have I forsaken thee; but with great mercies will I gather thee.”

So therefore, I look to him as a Husband..One who loves me and will take care of me, provide for me and protect me..everything a husband is supposed to do for you. It really fit at the time, because my earthly “husband” was rejecting me for other women. Yes, I, too, still have those carnal, fleshly lusts for that type of physical intimacy than an earthly husband can fulfill, but I know that it is a lust of the flesh and that if we walk in the Spirit, we won’t fulfill the lusts of the flesh. To seek out a man to marry just to fulfill that yearning is to make a provision for the lust of the flesh which is the wrong motivation for marriage and God cannot bless that…as I found out the hard way!

More inspiration comes from:
“Galations 5: 16This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

17For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.

18But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.

19Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, …”

I stopped here to point out that the TOP two works of the flesh are Adultery and fornication…both, although they could be also be considered spiritual sins, are most commonly thought of as sexual sins. The physical body has to be put in its place! We are made, as is pointed out in 1Thesselonians 5:23, as Spirit, Soul, and THEN Body!

So, I leave you with this blessing as my prayer:
“1 Thessalonians 5:23 -Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

I wholeheartedly agree and nothing I’ve written suggests that this should not be the case. Having a unique earthly relationship does not and should not preclude intimacy in our relationship with God. That is first, above all.

This would be to be sure, a marriage between men, and a male God, in some cases; or men and a church of men; or men and women, marrying an institution.

Which sounds OK

But does this mean that the “Defense of Marriage” acts – which define a marriage as being strictly a man and a woman – are making part of the Bible illegal? Or wrong in spirit?

Thank you so much for your kind words and for the encouragement. I do have hope and with all honesty I do believe that I will be married. I will wait patiently for the right one.
It is so hard to know what is right, when so many fellow Christians voice their opinion instead of the word. It is so difficult to know who is right and who is wrong. I do read my Bible, and most frequently have difficulty interpreting it, but with prayer and persistance I know I will be able to get through this.

Thanks again!
Bridget

Thank you so much for your honesty. Like Lisa, I have been where you are now. I got so tired of the platitudes that were constantly thrown at me – like maybe it was God’s will for me to be single, or maybe I had committed unrepented sin, or didn’t have enough faith, yadda, yadda, yadda, when I knew darn well that it was simply not my nature to live alone, and my daughter so longed for a ‘normal’ family like everyone else’s.

I am happily remarried now, and I pray the same for you, but I have never quite trusted Christians fully since my experience with them as a single parent. There were very few people in the church who didn’t consider me a crass sinner simply because of my divorced status. Thankfully, I am in a far different church now, the one I wish I could have had when my daughter could have used a kind word and emotional support from anyone, or even a few minutes of their time. They are really understanding folks to the single parents we have in our church family, and it has helped a lot to restore my own trust.

I shall pray for you to find satisfaction in your desire to be in a Godly marriage.

God bless, and please know there are others like you out here who do truly understand.

I cannot emphasize enough the point of what I believe the passage in 1 Corinthians 7 is not saying. Paul is not saying that singleness is better than marriage, because singleness is the better position in God’s eyes. That would contradict a number of passages elsewhere in Scripture concerning God’s design for marriage. Rather, Paul is advocating for undistracted devotion to the Lord. The single person does not have a spouse to deal with, and thus can focus more on the Lord whereas the married person must be concerned with the needs of their spouse. BUT, he is also saying that not all have the gift of singleness, which I take to mean celibacy. Not all people can be content and undistracted single.

One of the reasons that prompted me to write this post is the fact that so many confuse what Paul is saying, and in an effort to relieve the feelings that singleness spawns, use God as a surrogate spouse. I don’t think that is a good position to take, especially since it is not validated in Scripture.

But what is validated is that God sees our hearts. He knows all there is to know about us, even the stuff we haven’t even figured out yet. Read Psalm 139. He is good and only has kind intentions towards His children, even though at times it seems that He either ignores our hearts and is overly engaged in the discipline process. I have certainly felt this way at times. Just be honest with Him, He knows anyway. Give him your cares and seek to learn about Him by reading His precious word. It is hard at times, I know. But He does see and He does care.

He did say that marriage meant that the husband’s primary care would be for the wife, and that of the wife for her husband, but that (from the beginning) was what marriage was meant to be like.